Day of Mourning

By Daniel Cairns

My favourite Wigga Slam band Despised Icon have called it a day. I’d say I was sad, but as with many things these days, I don’t really care. They say it was to concentrate on families and that. Imagine if your dad was in the premier wigga slam band! It’d be soooo ace.

When I was still living in Scotland in space year 2007, I used to listen to one of their album’s on the bus when I was tootling into work. I was a confused young idiot. You see, I had just graduated, I was working in Primark (which is latin for Inferno) where I was getting bullied by some fat bitch with horrendous teeth, and had just been dumped (and speculatively cheated on) by a girl with a massive bush. I was not of sound mind. I was listening to My Dying Bride and Cannibal Corpse and taking that shit seriously. I’m pretty glad I eventually had a nervous breakdown and moved back in with my parents.

Anyhoo, I can’t remember which album it was, but it had some nice riffs. And a sample from the film Goldeneye, which I loved due to the N64 game of the same name. And a suitably dumbass video for one of the songs.

See? I quite like that. But cut to 4 years and some serious hairloss later, they revealed some pretty excessive wigga tendencies.

It’s great! You totally wouldn’t get any of these new djenty fucks making anything like this. They must have known how excellently silly it was. Next time I’m at a funeral I’m totally going to start drinking whiskey and pig squealing.

Bye bye Despised Icon!

Also, I think I’ve found my favourite song ever.

Just where does he pull the banjo from?

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