On Rap Music: The Rap Bus’s Final Journey

Last time we heard from Geoff the Rap Bus had been blown up by Nazis, and Geoff was stuck behind enemy lines in a brutal prison, hacking Spotify and making playlists. We embarked on a rescue mission that would require the commando-ninja talents of the whole Demon Pigeon team. It went off exactly like this

We were now somewhat unwelcome in parts of the USA that looked down on this sort of violence but fortunately, there were still plenty of places happy to welcome us and our fully-automatic large-calibre machine guns with open arms (satire).

It was now a race to get out of the country before Obama and his liberal communists caught up with us and took away our guns, but we tried to visit a couple of rappers on the way. We also had to get back home before Demon Pigeon closed forever and we all turned to stone.bus gifMinneapolis: Astronautalis

After being chased out of LA by some angry villagers we headed to Minneapolis because that was the next major city with a Greggs. Astronautalis was happy to let us hide out in his mansion for a couple of days while we rested and planned our next sprint towards freedom.

When I downloaded my digital copy of this guy’s latest album from the excellent Fake Four inc. label, the genre tags said “Historical Fiction Hip-Hop.” That’s funny isn’t it? It’s funny because it’s (somewhat) true.

I don’t know about you but I really like rap songs about US Civil War battles with huge choruses and videos with vampires in them.

I also like rap songs about Dimitri Mendeleev discovering the periodic table.

And I definitely like it when rappers “go in” over piano versions of Poker Face.

So Astronautalis ticks a lot of boxes for me.

Just as we were settling into life in the Astromansion though, a brick was thrown through the window with a note attached to it that read “Please Turn Over.” I turned the note over and read: “I’m coming for you. Love from Dog.” So Dog the Bounty Hunter was now on our trail?! We had to get moving.

bus gif

New York: YC The Cynic

There then followed a high speed chase along New York Road which is the main A road between Minneapolis and New York City. We were now being pursued by angry LA villagers and this guy:


So running away was very much a priority.

During our time in the Astromansion, Noel had managed to modify the Rap Bus using some tin foil and banana skins, enabling us to get as close to Ludicrous Speed as possible without attracting the attention of American traffic cops on cool motorcycles (55 MPH).

After another chase that involved High Octane Thrills, Edge of the Seat Suspense and a horse, we arrived at our next safe location, YC The Cynic’s pyramid fortress.

The_pyramid_fotress_by_UnidColorYC agreed to let us hang out with him for a while as long as we promised to say that he is one of the most talented and exciting young rappers around and that he has in fact already got pubes, despite what we said in our end of year round up. His first album proper after three mixtapes, 2013’s GNK, was 100% self-released and is both accessible and challenging, often cleverly subverting hip-hop tropes to add depth and complexity to the impressive delivery.

The hook to Murphy’s Law for example sounds tired and clichéd if you’re not paying attention, but listen to what YC is almost whispering in between each line and pay attention to the second verse in particular.

Similarly the hook to Negus sounds familiar to anyone that remembers the days when the likes of  DMX and Ja Rule were dominating our radios and TVs. However, the song is preceded by an interlude that sheds a whole new light on the song.

Also, best flipping of Tom’s Diner ever.

It was all very lovely inside the Pyramid Fortress but the angry villagers and Dog the Bounty Hunter had begun a siege and we were running out of pasties so we had to make a break for it again.

bus gif

Would we escape the angry mob and get back to Pigeon Towers before the gates shut forever? Well, there’s no room for a cliffhanger because we’re not doing any more of these so yes, of course we did.

However, similar to old skool Doctor Who when occasionally one of the companions would decide to stay on an alien planet, the Rap Bus decided to stay in America. Its talents were spotted by a talent spotting talent spotter and it is now enjoying a new career and unlimited Greggs sausage rolls. It sent us a video of its new job, looks pretty cool. Good luck to you Rap Bus, it’s been a lot of fun.


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